diūliǎn: 丢脸 - To Lose Face, To Be Disgraced, Embarrassing

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• Summary: The Chinese term `丢脸 (diūliǎn)` literally translates to “lose face” and is a fundamental cultural concept for any learner to grasp. It goes far beyond simple embarrassment, referring to a public loss of one's social standing, reputation, or honor. Understanding `diūliǎn` is key to navigating social and professional situations in China, as it is deeply connected to the cultural values of respect, group harmony, and the importance of one's public image (面子, miànzi).

• Pinyin (with tone marks): diūliǎn
• Part of Speech: Verb phrase (Verb-Object)
• HSK Level: HSK 4
• Concise Definition: To lose face; to be disgraced, shamed, or publicly embarrassed.
• In a Nutshell: `丢脸` is the act of doing something that damages your reputation or the reputation of your group (family, company, country) in the eyes of others. It's not just a personal feeling of awkwardness; it's a public event that lowers your social standing. The feeling is a potent mix of shame, humiliation, and disgrace.

• 丢 (diū): To lose; to misplace; to throw away. It implies an involuntary or careless loss.
• 脸 (liǎn): Face. In this context, it extends beyond the physical face to mean reputation, honor, and social standing.
• The characters combine with perfect literal and figurative sense: to “lose” one's “face” is to lose one's social honor and prestige.

The concept of `丢脸` is inseparable from the cultural cornerstone of `面子 (miànzi)`, or “face”. In Chinese culture, `面子` is a kind of social currency. It's a blend of one's prestige, reputation, influence, and the respect one commands from others. You can gain it, give it to others, and, most importantly, you can lose it. `丢脸` is the action that causes this loss. The crucial difference between `丢脸` and Western “embarrassment” is its public and collective nature.

• Western Embarrassment: Often a personal, fleeting feeling. If you trip and fall on an empty street, you might feel embarrassed, but the feeling is internal.
• Chinese `丢脸`: Inherently social. It requires an audience. You `丢脸` because other people witness your mistake, failure, or improper behavior. This public judgment is what damages your `面子`.

Furthermore, because of China's more collectivist culture, an individual's actions reflect on their entire group. A child who misbehaves in public can cause their parents to `丢脸`. An employee who makes a huge error can cause their company to `丢脸`. This ripple effect makes the act of `丢脸` a much more serious social transgression than simple personal awkwardness.

`丢脸` is a common, powerful term used in everyday life. It's almost always used in a negative and serious (though sometimes hyperbolic) manner.

• In Conversation: People often express a fear of losing face (“我怕丢脸了” - Wǒ pà diūliǎn le) as a reason for not trying something new or risky. Parents might scold a child with “别给我丢脸!” (Bié gěi wǒ diūliǎn! - Don't you dare embarrass me!).
• In Business: Causing a client to feel they have lost face can destroy a business deal. Publicly correcting a superior is a major way to make them `丢脸` and is a serious workplace taboo. The goal is often to ensure all parties can `有面子` (yǒu miànzi - have face).
• On Social Media: People might describe a cringeworthy or shameful public event as “太丢脸了!” (Tài diūliǎn le! - So embarrassing/shameful!).

• Example 1:
  • 他考试不及格，觉得很丢脸。
  • Pinyin: Tā kǎoshì bù jígé, juédé hěn diūliǎn.
  • English: He failed the exam and felt very disgraced.
  • Analysis: This connects failure with a loss of face, especially as academic success is highly valued. The shame comes from not meeting expectations (of himself, his family, his teachers).
• Example 2:
  • 在老板面前说错话，我真是丢脸丢到家了。
  • Pinyin: Zài lǎobǎn miànqián shuō cuò huà, wǒ zhēnshi diūliǎn diū dào jiā le.
  • English: I really lost face completely by saying the wrong thing in front of the boss.
  • Analysis: The phrase “丢到家了” (diū dào jiā le - lost face all the way home) is a common intensifier, meaning “to the extreme” or “utterly.” It highlights the severity of the situation.
• Example 3:
  • 你这么做会让我们全家都丢脸的！
  • Pinyin: Nǐ zhème zuò huì ràng wǒmen quán jiā dōu diūliǎn de!
  • English: Doing this will make our whole family lose face!
  • Analysis: A perfect example of the collective nature of `丢脸`. The individual's actions bring shame upon the entire group.
• Example 4:
  • 我不想在大家面前唱歌，因为我怕丢脸。
  • Pinyin: Wǒ bùxiǎng zài dàjiā miànqián chànggē, yīnwèi wǒ pà diūliǎn.
  • English: I don't want to sing in front of everyone because I'm afraid of embarrassing myself (losing face).
  • Analysis: This shows how the fear of `丢脸` can prevent someone from taking a social risk. The core fear is being judged negatively by the group.
• Example 5:
  • A: 你为什么不承认你错了？ B: 我要是承认了，多丢脸啊！
  • Pinyin: A: Nǐ wèishéme bù chéngrèn nǐ cuòle? B: Wǒ yàoshi chéngrènle, duō diūliǎn a!
  • English: A: Why don't you admit you were wrong? B: If I admitted it, how humiliating would that be!
  • Analysis: Admitting a mistake, especially a public one, can be a direct cause of `丢脸`. “Saving face” might involve refusing to admit fault.
• Example 6:
  • 别再提那件事了，太丢脸了。
  • Pinyin: Bié zài tí nà jiàn shì le, tài diūliǎn le.
  • English: Don't bring that up again, it was too humiliating.
  • Analysis: This shows how the memory of a face-losing event can carry a lasting sting.
• Example 7:
  • 一个中国游客在国外的不文明行为，真是给中国人丢脸。
  • Pinyin: Yīgè zhōngguó yóukè zài guówài de bù wénmíng xíngwéi, zhēnshi gěi zhōngguó rén diūliǎn.
  • English: The uncivilized behavior of a Chinese tourist abroad is truly a disgrace to Chinese people.
  • Analysis: This illustrates the concept of `丢脸` at a national level. The individual's actions are seen as reflecting on the entire country's reputation.
• Example 8:
  • 他这么有钱，还去偷东西，简直是丢脸。
  • Pinyin: Tā zhème yǒu qián, hái qù tōu dōngxī, jiǎnzhí shì diūliǎn.
  • English: He's so rich, yet he still goes and steals things; it's simply disgraceful.
  • Analysis: This highlights the moral dimension of `丢脸`. The action is shameful not just because it's illegal, but because it violates social and moral expectations for someone of his status.
• Example 9:
  • 你就不怕丢脸吗？敢穿成这样出门！
  • Pinyin: Nǐ jiù bùpà diūliǎn ma? Gǎn chuān chéng zhèyàng chūmén!
  • English: Aren't you afraid of losing face? Daring to go out dressed like that!
  • Analysis: A rhetorical question used to criticize someone's behavior or appearance, implying it falls far below social norms.
• Example 10:
  • 虽然这次失败了，但只要我们不放弃，就不算丢脸。
  • Pinyin: Suīrán zhècì shībàile, dàn zhǐyào wǒmen bù fàngqì, jiù bù suàn diūliǎn.
  • English: Although we failed this time, as long as we don't give up, it doesn't count as losing face.
  • Analysis: This shows a more nuanced, positive framing. It suggests that true disgrace comes from giving up, not from the act of failing itself.

A frequent mistake for learners is to overuse `丢脸` for minor situations where a lighter term would be more appropriate.

• `丢脸 (diūliǎn)` vs. `不好意思 (bù hǎoyìsi)`
  • `不好意思` is for minor, personal awkwardness or polite apologies. It means “to feel sheepish,” “excuse me,” or “sorry for the inconvenience.”
  • Example: You are five minutes late for a coffee with a friend. You should say: “不好意思，我来晚了。” (Bù hǎoyìsi, wǒ lái wǎnle. - Sorry, I'm late.)
  • Incorrect Usage: If you say, “我丢脸了，我来晚了” (Wǒ diūliǎnle, wǒ lái wǎnle), it sounds overly dramatic, as if being five minutes late brought you great public shame. It would be very strange.
  • Rule of Thumb: If it's a small inconvenience or a moment of personal shyness, use `不好意思`. If it's a public failure, a moral transgression, or something that damages your reputation, use `丢脸`.
• `丢脸 (diūliǎn)` vs. `尴尬 (gāngà)`
  • `尴尬` means “awkward” and describes a situation. It's the uncomfortable feeling you get when you're in a socially awkward predicament. A situation can be `尴尬` without anyone necessarily losing face.
  • Example: You're in an elevator with your boss, and neither of you says anything. The silence is `尴尬`. No one has `丢脸`. However, if you then accidentally press all the buttons and the elevator stops at every floor, that action might make you feel you have `丢脸` in front of your boss.

• 面子 (miànzi) - The foundational concept of “face,” honor, and social prestige that can be lost or gained.
• 给面子 (gěi miànzi) - To “give face”; to show someone respect, defer to them, or do them a favor to uphold their honor.
• 有面子 (yǒu miànzi) - To “have face”; to possess prestige, honor, and a good reputation. The opposite state of `丢脸`.
• 丢人 (diūrén) - A very common and slightly more colloquial synonym for `丢脸`. Literally “to lose person,” it's often used interchangeably.
• 出丑 (chūchǒu) - To make a fool of oneself; to expose one's ugliness/faults. Very similar to `丢脸` but emphasizes the foolish or “ugly” nature of the act.
• 没面子 (méi miànzi) - “To have no face.” It's more of a state than an action. If you have done something to `丢脸`, you now `没面子`.
• 不好意思 (bù hǎoyìsi) - A much milder term for feeling shy, apologetic, or slightly embarrassed.
• 尴尬 (gāngà) - Awkward; describes an uncomfortable social situation.
• 耻辱 (chǐrǔ) - Shame; disgrace; humiliation. A much more formal and stronger word than `丢脸`, often used for major national or historical humiliations.