Keywords: qingjia, 亲家, Chinese in-laws, co-in-laws meaning, parents of son-in-law, parents of daughter-in-law, Chinese family relationships, what is qingjia, how to say in-laws in Chinese, family culture in China.
Summary: In Chinese culture, the term 亲家 (qìngjia) refers to the specific relationship between the two sets of parents of a married couple. It's a concept often translated as “co-in-laws” and signifies the formal bond created between two families through their children's marriage. Understanding qìngjia is essential for grasping the importance of family networks and inter-family dynamics in China, a relationship for which there is no single-word equivalent in English.
Core Meaning
Pinyin (with tone marks): qìngjia
Part of Speech: Noun
HSK Level: N/A (Considered an advanced or cultural vocabulary item)
Concise Definition: The term used by one set of parents to refer to their child's spouse's parents.
In a Nutshell: Imagine two people, Li Wei and Zhang Lin, get married. Li Wei's parents and Zhang Lin's parents now have a special relationship with each other. They are 亲家 (qìngjia). This isn't just a label; it signifies a new, formal connection between two distinct families, united by the marriage. They are now family allies, expected to support each other and, most importantly, the new couple and their future grandchildren.
Character Breakdown
亲 (qìng): In most contexts, this character is pronounced `qīn` and means “parent,” “relative,” or “intimate/close.” However, in the specific word `亲家`, it takes on the rare pronunciation `qìng`. This change signifies a formal, established relationship through marriage, distinct from blood relations.
家 (jiā): This character means “family,” “home,” or “household.”
The characters combine to literally mean something like “marriage-related families.” The term beautifully captures the idea that a marriage formally links two separate 家 (jiā), creating a new and important 亲 (qìng) relationship between them.
Cultural Context and Significance
In traditional and even modern Chinese culture, marriage is often seen as a union of two families, not just two individuals. The 亲家 (qìngjia) relationship is the formal embodiment of this principle. It establishes a new, wider family network built on mutual respect and shared interests—primarily the success and happiness of the married couple and the continuation of the family line through grandchildren.
Comparison to Western Culture: In many Western cultures, the relationship between a couple's parents can be anything from very close to non-existent. There is no specific, universally used term like 亲家 (qìngjia). The English language's lack of a single word for “my child's spouse's parents” highlights a cultural difference. While English speakers might say “my son's in-laws” or “our children's parents-in-law,” the term 亲家 (qìngjia) carries a deeper sense of formal connection, social obligation, and a shared destiny.
This concept is tied to the value of collectivism, where the family unit is paramount. A good 亲家 relationship brings honor and stability, while a poor one can cause stress for the entire extended family. Maintaining harmony between the 亲家 is a significant social goal.
Practical Usage in Modern China
The term 亲家 (qìngjia) is used both as a form of address and as a reference. The two sets of parents become central figures during wedding planning, major holidays (like Spring Festival), and especially after the birth of a grandchild.
Forms of Address:
When speaking directly to the father of your child's spouse, you would call him 亲家公 (qìngjiagōng).
When speaking directly to the mother of your child's spouse, you would call her 亲家母 (qìngjiamǔ).
When speaking about them together, or referring to the family as a whole, you use 亲家 (qìngjia).
Social Interactions: The relationship involves regular communication, gift-giving on holidays, and mutual support. For example, the two sets of parents will often collaborate closely on planning the wedding or celebrating their grandchild's “full moon” (one-month) party. The relationship is generally formal and respectful, especially at the beginning.
English: We are qìngjia now, we should visit each other more often in the future.
Analysis: A common phrase used to affirm the new relationship and express a desire for future closeness. `走动 (zǒudòng)` here means “to visit” or “to interact.”
Example 9:
选个好亲家比给孩子找个好对象还重要。
Pinyin: Xuǎn ge hǎo qìngjia bǐ gěi háizi zhǎo ge hǎo duìxiàng hái zhòngyào.
English: Choosing a good family-in-law is even more important than finding a good partner for your child.
Analysis: A somewhat traditional or hyperbolic statement that underscores the cultural weight placed on the inter-family relationship.
English: Although my co-in-laws live in another city, we often video chat.
Analysis: This shows how the 亲家 relationship is maintained in modern times, even across distances.
Nuances and Common Mistakes
Pronunciation is Key: The most common mistake for learners is pronouncing it `qīnjiā`. The correct and only pronunciation for this specific term is qìngjia. Using `qīnjiā` will sound incorrect and confusing to native speakers.
It's Not a General “In-Law”: A crucial mistake is to use 亲家 to refer to any in-law. It only describes the relationship between the two sets of parents.
Incorrect: My son-in-law is my 亲家. (他是我亲家。)
Correct: My son-in-law is my `女婿 (nǚxu)`. (他是我女婿。)
Correct: My son-in-law's parents are my 亲家. (我女婿的父母是我的亲家。)
False Friend: “In-laws”: In English, “in-laws” is a broad term. A woman can say, “I'm visiting my in-laws,” referring to her husband's parents. However, she would never call her own parents her “in-laws.” Similarly, in Chinese, the two sets of parents are 亲家to each other, but not to their own children.
Related Terms and Concepts
* 亲家公 (qìngjiagōng) - The specific term for the father of one's child's spouse.
* 亲家母 (qìngjiamǔ) - The specific term for the mother of one's child's spouse.
* 姻亲 (yīnqīn) - A formal, literary term for all relatives by marriage (in-laws). 亲家 is a specific type of 姻亲.