yuānyuānxiāngbào héshí liǎo: 冤冤相报何时了 - When will the cycle of revenge ever end?

• Keywords: yuanyuanxiangbaoheshiliao, 冤冤相报何时了, Chinese proverb about revenge, when will the cycle of revenge end, Buddhist saying revenge, endless vengeance, Chinese philosophy, letting go of hatred, stop fighting, bury the hatchet.
• Summary: “冤冤相报何时了” (yuānyuānxiāngbào héshí liǎo) is a profound Chinese proverb that asks, “When will the cycle of revenge and counter-revenge ever end?” Rooted in Buddhist and Taoist philosophy, it's a plea for forgiveness and reconciliation, highlighting the futility and endless suffering caused by pursuing vengeance. This phrase is often used to mediate conflicts, comment on feuds, and express a deep desire for peace over retribution.

• Pinyin (with tone marks): yuān yuān xiāng bào hé shí liǎo
• Part of Speech: Chengyu (成语) / Proverb / Rhetorical Question
• HSK Level: N/A
• Concise Definition: When will this mutual cycle of grievances and retaliation ever conclude?
• In a Nutshell: This isn't a statement; it's a weary, philosophical question. Imagine two people endlessly hurting each other, each time justifying their actions as “payback.” This phrase is what a wise observer would say to them, urging them to see that revenge only creates more victims and traps everyone in a spiral of pain. It's a call to be the bigger person and break the cycle.

• 冤 (yuān): Grievance, injustice, a wrong that has been suffered. Repeating it as `冤冤` emphasizes the continuous, back-and-forth nature of these grievances.
• 相 (xiāng): Mutually, with each other. This points to the reciprocal nature of the action.
• 报 (bào): To repay or to retaliate. In this context, it specifically means to get revenge.
• 何时 (héshí): When? At what time? This is a standard way to form a question about time.
• 了 (liǎo): To end, to finish, to conclude. (Note: This is the `liǎo` pronunciation, not the common particle `le`. Here it functions as a verb meaning “to resolve” or “to finish.”)

The characters literally translate to: “Grievance for grievance, mutually retaliating—when will it end?” The structure paints a vivid picture of an unending, destructive loop.

• Philosophical Roots: The saying is deeply influenced by Buddhist concepts of karma (因果报应) and compassion, as well as Taoist ideals of harmony and letting go. It argues that the only true way to “win” a feud is to stop playing the game. Continuing the cycle only generates more negative karma for everyone involved. The famous line is often cited from the classic Chinese novel “Dream of the Red Chamber” (红楼梦), cementing its place in the cultural lexicon.
• Comparison to Western Concepts: The Western phrase “An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth” describes the principle of retributive justice—that a punishment should match the crime. 冤冤相报何时了 is a direct critique of this idea. While “an eye for an eye” can be seen as a framework for justice, the Chinese phrase warns that this framework leads to a world where “everyone is blind.” It's not about what's “fair” in retribution; it's about the wisdom of ending the conflict altogether for the greater good of peace and harmony (和谐, héxié).

This proverb is formal in origin but is widely understood and can be used in various situations to sound wise and contemplative.

• Conflict Mediation: It's the perfect phrase for someone trying to mediate a fight between friends, family members, or even business partners. It appeals to their higher-level thinking, asking them to consider the long-term consequences of their feud.
• Social and Political Commentary: Journalists and netizens often use this phrase when commenting on protracted conflicts, like corporate rivalries, celebrity feuds, or international political disputes that seem to have no end in sight. It implies a sense of exhaustion with the ongoing hostility.
• Personal Reflection: You might hear someone sigh and say this to themselves while watching a movie about a revenge plot or hearing about a family argument that has spanned generations. It's an expression of wisdom and weariness.

The connotation is almost always somber and pleading, urging a stop to negativity. It's rarely used for trivial matters; it's reserved for serious, damaging cycles of conflict.

• Example 1:
  • 你们两家都斗了三代了，冤冤相报何时了啊？为了孩子，算了吧。
  • Pinyin: Nǐmen liǎng jiā dōu dòu le sān dài le, yuānyuānxiāngbào héshí liǎo a? Wèile háizi, suàn le ba.
  • English: Your two families have been feuding for three generations. When will this cycle of revenge ever end? For the sake of the children, just let it go.
  • Analysis: A classic use case for mediating a long-standing family feud. The phrase elevates the plea from a simple “stop fighting” to a deep, philosophical appeal.
• Example 2:
  • 这两个公司在市场上恶意竞争，互相攻击，真是冤冤相报何时了。
  • Pinyin: Zhè liǎng gè gōngsī zài shìchǎng shàng èyì jìngzhēng, hùxiāng gōngjī, zhēnshi yuānyuānxiāngbào héshí liǎo.
  • English: These two companies are engaged in vicious competition in the market, constantly attacking each other. It really makes you wonder when this cycle of retaliation will ever end.
  • Analysis: Used here as a commentary on a destructive business rivalry. It implies that their actions are hurting not just each other, but potentially the whole industry.
• Example 3:
  • 算了，他骂我，我就不回骂了。冤冤相报何时了，我不想把时间浪费在这种事上。
  • Pinyin: Suàn le, tā mà wǒ, wǒ jiù bù huí mà le. Yuānyuānxiāngbào héshí liǎo, wǒ bù xiǎng bǎ shíjiān làngfèi zài zhè zhǒng shì shàng.
  • English: Forget it. He insulted me, but I'm not going to insult him back. When does the cycle of revenge ever end? I don't want to waste my time on this kind of thing.
  • Analysis: A great example of someone using the phrase for personal decision-making, choosing to be the one to break the cycle of negativity.
• Example 4:
  • 老师告诉那两个打架的同学：“冤冤相报何时了？握手言和吧。”
  • Pinyin: Lǎoshī gàosù nà liǎng gè dǎjià de tóngxué: “Yuānyuānxiāngbào héshí liǎo? Wòshǒu yánhé ba.”
  • English: The teacher told the two fighting students, “When will this cycle of hurting each other end? Shake hands and make peace.”
  • Analysis: This shows how the phrase can be used in an educational context to teach a moral lesson about forgiveness and de-escalation.
• Example 5:
  • 看完那部复仇电影，我唯一的感想就是：冤冤相报何时了。
  • Pinyin: Kàn wán nà bù fùchóu diànyǐng, wǒ wéiyī de gǎnxiǎng jiùshì: yuānyuānxiāngbào héshí liǎo.
  • English: After watching that revenge movie, my only thought was: when will the cycle of retribution ever end?
  • Analysis: Used as a literary or film critique, summarizing the theme or moral of a story.
• Example 6:
  • 网络上的骂战就是典型的冤冤相报何时了，没有人是赢家。
  • Pinyin: Wǎngluò shàng de màzhàn jiùshì diǎnxíng de yuānyuānxiāngbào héshí liǎo, méiyǒu rén shì yíngjiā.
  • English: Online flame wars are a classic example of the endless cycle of revenge; nobody is a winner.
  • Analysis: This applies the ancient proverb to a very modern phenomenon, showing its timeless relevance.
• Example 7:
  • 作为调解人，我的责任就是让双方都明白冤冤相报何时了的道理。
  • Pinyin: Zuòwéi tiáojiě rén, wǒ de zérèn jiùshì ràng shuāngfāng dōu míngbái yuānyuānxiāngbào héshí liǎo de dàolǐ.
  • English: As a mediator, my responsibility is to make both parties understand the principle that the cycle of revenge is a dead end.
  • Analysis: Here, the phrase is referred to as a “道理” (dàolǐ), or a “principle/reason,” highlighting its status as a piece of accepted wisdom.
• Example 8:
  • 历史告诉我们，战争只会带来更多的战争，冤冤相报何时了？
  • Pinyin: Lìshǐ gàosù wǒmen, zhànzhēng zhǐ huì dàilái gèng duō de zhànzhēng, yuānyuānxiāngbào héshí liǎo?
  • English: History tells us that war only brings more war. When will this cycle of retaliation ever end?
  • Analysis: This scales the concept up to the level of international conflict and historical patterns.
• Example 9:
  • 他放弃了复仇的念头，因为他终于懂了冤冤相报何时了。
  • Pinyin: Tā fàngqìle fùchóu de niàntou, yīnwèi tā zhōngyú dǒngle yuānyuānxiāngbào héshí liǎo.
  • English: He gave up the idea of revenge because he finally understood that the cycle of vengeance is endless.
  • Analysis: Shows the phrase as a moment of epiphany or realization that leads to a change in behavior.
• Example 10:
  • 你如果为了这点小事就去报复，那只会导致冤冤相报何时了的局面。
  • Pinyin: Nǐ rúguǒ wèile zhè diǎn xiǎoshì jiù qù bàofù, nà zhǐ huì dǎozhì yuānyuānxiāngbào héshí liǎo de júmiàn.
  • English: If you go and get revenge over such a small thing, it will only lead to a situation of an endless cycle of retaliation.
  • Analysis: A warning against starting a cycle of revenge, even over something minor. The phrase describes the potential negative outcome.

• It is NOT a justification for revenge: This is the most critical point. An English speaker might mistakenly think it means something like, “Of course we have to retaliate, that's the way it is.” It means the exact opposite. It is a powerful argument against retaliation.
• Don't use it for trivial matters: Using this for a minor disagreement (e.g., “He took my parking spot, so I keyed his car! 冤冤相报何时了!”) is dramatic overkill. The phrase is reserved for serious, often long-running conflicts where real harm is being done.
• “False Friend” vs. “What goes around, comes around”: While both touch on cause and effect, their focus is different. “What goes around, comes around” is a passive observation that cosmic justice (karma) will eventually happen. 冤冤相报何时了 is an active, human-centered plea. It acknowledges the suffering happening right now and begs people to use their own agency to stop it, rather than waiting for fate or karma to sort it out.

• 以德报怨 (yǐ dé bào yuàn): To repay grievance with virtue. This is the solution to the problem posed by `冤冤相报何时了`.
• 化干戈为玉帛 (huà gāngē wéi yùbó): Literally “to turn spears and shields into jade and silk.” The Chinese equivalent of “to bury the hatchet,” representing the desired outcome.
• 报仇 (bàochóu): To take revenge; to avenge. This is the action that the proverb warns against.
• 冤家 (yuānjia): A nemesis or sworn enemy. These are the people trapped in the cycle. (Interestingly, it can also be used ironically to refer to one's spouse or a “fated but difficult” lover).
• 因果报应 (yīnguǒ bàoyìng): The Buddhist concept of karma; cause-and-effect retribution. This is the philosophical underpinning of the proverb.
• 冤有头，债有主 (yuān yǒu tóu, zhài yǒu zhǔ): “Every grievance has its source, every debt has its debtor.” A related but different idea that suggests blame (or revenge) should be precisely targeted, not spread indiscriminately, which can sometimes be seen as an argument against an endlessly escalating feud.
• 忍一时风平浪静，退一步海阔天空 (rěn yīshí fēngpínglàngjìng, tuì yībù hǎikuòtiānkōng): “Endure for a moment, and the wind and waves will calm; take a step back, and you'll find a vast sea and open sky.” A famous proverb that advocates for tolerance and stepping back from conflict as a path to a better outcome.