yuèfù: 岳父 - Father-in-law (Wife's Father)

• Keywords: yuefu, yuèfù, 岳父, Chinese for father-in-law, wife's father in Chinese, 岳父 meaning, how to say father-in-law in Chinese, Chinese in-laws, 岳母, 岳父岳母, Chinese family terms, laozhangren, 老丈人.
• Summary: Learn the essential Chinese term 岳父 (yuèfù), the formal word for “father-in-law”—specifically, a man's wife's father. This comprehensive guide explores its cultural significance, how to use it correctly in modern conversation, and distinguishes it from other Chinese family titles. Understand the deep respect embedded in this term to navigate Chinese family relationships with cultural awareness and confidence.

• Pinyin (with tone marks): yuèfù
• Part of Speech: Noun
• HSK Level: HSK 5
• Concise Definition: A man's father-in-law; the father of one's wife.
• In a Nutshell: 岳父 (yuèfù) is the standard, formal term a husband uses to refer to his wife's father. It embodies respect and acknowledges a formal family bond established through marriage. While it's the correct word to use when talking about him, it's often considered too formal for direct address, where a more intimate term like `爸 (bà)` is preferred.

• 岳 (yuè): This character's original meaning is “high mountain,” specifically referring to one of China's five sacred mountains. A popular story traces its use in this context to the legendary Emperor Yao, who tested his future son-in-law, Shun, near Mount Yue. Thus, “岳” became associated with the family of one's wife.
• 父 (fù): This character simply means “father.” The pictograph is thought to originally depict a hand holding a stone axe, symbolizing paternal authority and the role of the father as a worker or leader.
• Together, 岳父 (yuèfù) literally translates to “mountain father.” This combination evokes an image of a respected, strong, and stately figure, reflecting the traditional importance and status of the father-in-law in Chinese culture.

• In Chinese culture, the relationship between a son-in-law (`女婿 nǚxu`) and his wife's parents (`岳父岳母 yuèfù yuèmǔ`) is a significant one, governed by principles of respect and filial piety (`孝顺 xiàoshùn`). The marriage is not just a union of two individuals, but of two families. A son-in-law is expected to show deference, care, and support for his wife's parents, and the term 岳父 (yuèfù) reflects this formal respect.
• Comparison to Western Culture: This contrasts with the more informal norms in many Western cultures. For example, in the United States, it is common for a son-in-law to call his father-in-law by his first name (e.g., “Hi, Mike!”). In China, addressing your 岳父 by his given name would be considered extremely rude and a sign of poor upbringing. The use of a formal title is essential to maintaining family harmony and showing respect. The relationship is less about friendship and more about fulfilling a defined familial role.

The most crucial rule to understand is the difference between referring to your father-in-law and addressing him directly.

• Referring (Talking About Him): 岳父 is the perfect word to use when talking about your wife's father to a third party.
  • e.g., “My father-in-law lives in Shanghai.” (`我岳父住在上海。`)
• Addressing (Talking To Him): Directly calling him “岳父” to his face is uncommon in daily life. It sounds overly formal, distant, and like something from a television drama. Instead, once married, a son-in-law will typically adopt the same term his wife uses:
  • 爸 (bà) or 爸爸 (bàba): This is the most common and affectionate form of address. It signals that you have truly joined the family.
  • Before marriage, when dating, a man would typically call his girlfriend's father 叔叔 (shūshu), a general respectful term for an older man, which translates to “uncle.” Calling him 岳父 before being married would be seen as presumptuous.

• Example 1:
  • 我岳父是一名医生。
  • Pinyin: Wǒ yuèfù shì yī míng yīshēng.
  • English: My father-in-law is a doctor.
  • Analysis: A simple, neutral statement used to describe one's father-in-law to another person.
• Example 2:
  • 这个周末我打算去看我岳父。
  • Pinyin: Zhège zhōumò wǒ dǎsuàn qù kàn wǒ yuèfù.
  • English: I plan to go see my father-in-law this weekend.
  • Analysis: This shows how 岳父 is used to refer to him when discussing plans.
• Example 3:
  • 我岳父对我很好，就像对自己的儿子一样。
  • Pinyin: Wǒ yuèfù duì wǒ hěn hǎo, jiù xiàng duì zìjǐ de érzi yīyàng.
  • English: My father-in-law is very good to me, just like his own son.
  • Analysis: This sentence expresses a positive relationship while still using the formal term of reference.
• Example 4:
  • 你岳父的身体最近怎么样？
  • Pinyin: Nǐ yuèfù de shēntǐ zuìjìn zěnmeyàng?
  • English: How has your father-in-law's health been recently?
  • Analysis: A common question between friends or colleagues, demonstrating the use of 岳父 when asking about someone else's family.
• Example 5:
  • 我非常感谢我的岳父和岳母对我们婚姻的支持。
  • Pinyin: Wǒ fēicháng gǎnxiè wǒ de yuèfù hé yuèmǔ duì wǒmen hūnyīn de zhīchí.
  • English: I am very grateful for my father-in-law and mother-in-law's support of our marriage.
  • Analysis: This is a more formal sentence, suitable for a wedding speech or a formal occasion. It often appears with `岳母 (yuèmǔ)`.
• Example 6:
  • 这瓶酒是给我岳父买的。
  • Pinyin: Zhè píng jiǔ shì gěi wǒ yuèfù mǎi de.
  • English: I bought this bottle of wine for my father-in-law.
  • Analysis: A common context, talking about buying gifts for family members.
• Example 7:
  • 我岳父退休前是一名工程师。
  • Pinyin: Wǒ yuèfù tuìxiū qián shì yī míng gōngchéngshī.
  • English: My father-in-law was an engineer before he retired.
  • Analysis: Used here to talk about his profession or past.
• Example 8:
  • 每次去岳父家，他都会做一桌子好菜。
  • Pinyin: Měi cì qù yuèfù jiā, tā dōu huì zuò yī zhuōzi hǎo cài.
  • English: Every time I go to my father-in-law's house, he cooks a table full of delicious food.
  • Analysis: Highlights a warm, personal experience while still maintaining the formal term of reference.
• Example 9:
  • 我需要和我岳父商量一下这件事。
  • Pinyin: Wǒ xūyào hé wǒ yuèfù shāngliang yīxià zhè jiàn shì.
  • English: I need to discuss this matter with my father-in-law.
  • Analysis: Shows the term being used in the context of seeking advice or making a family decision.
• Example 10:
  • 很多人觉得和岳父搞好关系很重要。
  • Pinyin: Hěn duō rén juéde hé yuèfù gǎo hǎo guānxì hěn zhòngyào.
  • English: Many people think it's very important to have a good relationship with their father-in-law.
  • Analysis: A general statement about the cultural importance of the relationship.

• Biggest Mistake: Direct Address. Never walk up to your father-in-law and say, “你好, 岳父! (Nǐ hǎo, yuèfù!).” This is a classic foreigner mistake. It sounds cold and overly formal. You should call him 爸 (bà).
• Confusing In-Laws: 岳父 (yuèfù) is exclusively for the wife's father. A wife calls her husband's father 公公 (gōnggong). Mixing these up is a major error.
  • Incorrect: 他是我的岳父。(Said by a wife about her husband's father).
  • Correct: 他是我的公公。(Said by a wife about her husband's father).
• Pre-Marriage Presumption: Using 岳父 to refer to your girlfriend's father before you are married is often considered presumptuous and can be awkward. Stick to 叔叔 (shūshu) until the marriage is official.

• 岳母 (yuèmǔ) - The direct counterpart: mother-in-law (wife's mother).
• 公公 (gōnggong) - The father-in-law from the other side of the family: a wife's term for her husband's father.
• 婆婆 (pópo) - A wife's term for her husband's mother.
• 女婿 (nǚxu) - The person who has a 岳父: son-in-law.
• 老丈人 (lǎozhàngrén) - A very common, colloquial, and slightly informal term for 岳父. It's often used affectionately among peers.
• 泰山 (Tàishān) - A very formal and archaic term for 岳父, referencing the great Mount Tai. You might see it in literature but won't hear it in daily conversation.
• 亲家 (qìngjia) - The reciprocal term used between the two sets of parents. Your father and your 岳父 would call each other `亲家`.
• 孝顺 (xiàoshùn) - Filial piety; the cultural value of respecting and caring for one's parents and elders, which extends to in-laws.
• 爸爸 (bàba) - “Dad”; the term a son-in-law should use for directly addressing his 岳父.