guò hé chāi qiáo: 过河拆桥 - To Kick Down the Ladder, Betray a Helper

• Keywords: guo he chai qiao, guò hé chāi qiáo, 过河拆桥, Chinese idiom for ungrateful, kick down the ladder in Chinese, betray a helper Chinese, Chinese proverbs, ungrateful person Chinese, Chinese idiom about betrayal.
• Summary: 过河拆桥 (guò hé chāi qiáo) is a popular Chinese idiom (Chengyu) that literally translates to “tear down the bridge after crossing the river.” It vividly describes the act of ungratefully abandoning or betraying someone who has helped you achieve your goal. This powerful phrase is used to condemn disloyal and selfish behavior, much like the English expression “to kick down the ladder.” Understanding 过河拆桥 is key to grasping Chinese cultural values around loyalty, gratitude, and interpersonal relationships.

• Pinyin (with tone marks): guò hé chāi qiáo
• Part of Speech: Idiom (Chengyu / 成语), Verb Phrase
• HSK Level: Advanced / HSK 6+
• Concise Definition: To discard or betray a helper after their assistance is no longer needed.
• In a Nutshell: Imagine you're stuck on one side of a dangerous, fast-flowing river. Someone comes along and helps you build a sturdy bridge to get to the other side, where opportunity awaits. The moment your feet touch the safe ground, you turn around and immediately dismantle the bridge, leaving your helper stranded and ensuring no one else can follow. This is the essence of 过河拆桥. It's a powerful image of cold, calculated ingratitude.

• 过 (guò): To cross, to pass over.
• 河 (hé): River. A symbol of an obstacle or challenge.
• 拆 (chāi): To tear down, to dismantle, to break.
• 桥 (qiáo): Bridge. A symbol of help, connection, or a solution provided by someone.

The four characters create a clear, chronological story: you first cross the river (overcome a problem) using the bridge (with someone's help), and then you tear it down (discard the helper). The logic of the phrase makes its figurative meaning easy to remember.

• The idiom 过河拆桥 touches upon one of the most serious social fouls in Chinese culture: ingratitude. Traditional values place a huge emphasis on repaying kindness (报恩, bào'ēn) and maintaining loyalty and righteousness (有情有义, yǒuqíng yǒu yì). Someone who commits the act of 过河拆桥 is seen as untrustworthy, selfish, and lacking basic moral character. They are violating the unspoken rules of 人情 (rénqíng), the web of social obligations and favors that underpins relationships.
• Comparison to Western Concepts:
  • “To burn one's bridges” is a common but inexact comparison. Burning your bridges usually means acting in a way that eliminates your option to return to a previous situation (e.g., quitting a job in a rage). It is often a self-sabotaging act.
  • “To kick down the ladder” is a much closer parallel. This phrase implies reaching a high position and then removing the means for others—including those who may have helped you—to follow. Both describe a selfish act to secure one's own advantage. However, 过河拆桥 often carries a stronger, more personal sense of betrayal against a specific benefactor.

• 过河拆桥 is used frequently in modern Chinese to criticize people, companies, or even governments for their ingratitude. It is always negative and carries a strong tone of condemnation.
• In Business: It's often used to describe a company that lays off its founding employees after becoming successful, or a business partner who cuts another out of a deal once the difficult work is done.
• In Personal Relationships: You might use it to complain about a “friend” who used you for your connections or knowledge and then disappeared once they got what they wanted.
• In Politics: It's commonly seen in commentary about politicians who abandon their allies, mentors, or voter base after they win an election.

• Example 1:
  • 他一当上经理，就把推荐他的老朋友给开除了，真是过河拆桥！
  • Pinyin: Tā yī dāng shàng jīnglǐ, jiù bǎ tuījiàn tā de lǎo péngyǒu gěi kāichú le, zhēn shì guò hé chāi qiáo!
  • English: As soon as he became the manager, he fired the old friend who had recommended him. That's a classic case of kicking down the ladder!
  • Analysis: This example shows a clear act of betrayal in a professional context. The phrase is used as a concluding comment to judge the action.
• Example 2:
  • 你不能这么过河拆桥，别忘了在你最困难的时候是谁帮助了你。
  • Pinyin: Nǐ bùnéng zhème guò hé chāi qiáo, bié wàng le zài nǐ zuì kùnnán de shíhòu shì shéi bāngzhù le nǐ.
  • English: You can't just discard me like this; don't forget who helped you when you were in your most difficult time.
  • Analysis: Here, the phrase is used as a direct accusation and a moral appeal, reminding the person of the help they received.
• Example 3:
  • 我们公司要做一个有良心的企业，绝不做过河拆桥的事情。
  • Pinyin: Wǒmen gōngsī yào zuò yīgè yǒu liángxīn de qǐyè, jué bù zuò guò hé chāi qiáo de shìqíng.
  • English: Our company wants to be an enterprise with a conscience; we will never do things like betraying our partners.
  • Analysis: This shows the idiom used in a negative construction (“绝不做” - will never do) to state a company's principles, highlighting the act as something to be avoided.
• Example 4:
  • 我帮了他那么多，现在他成功了，见到我却假装不认识，这种过河拆桥的人不值得交往。
  • Pinyin: Wǒ bāng le tā nàme duō, xiànzài tā chénggōng le, jiàn dào wǒ què jiǎzhuāng bù rènshí, zhè zhǒng guò hé chāi qiáo de rén bù zhídé jiāowǎng.
  • English: I helped him so much, and now that he's successful, he pretends not to know me when he sees me. This kind of ungrateful person isn't worth being friends with.
  • Analysis: This is a common complaint in personal relationships. The phrase 过河拆桥的人 (guò hé chāi qiáo de rén) means “an ungrateful person” or “a backstabber.”
• Example 5:
  • 小心点那个政客，他为了权力什么都做得出来，过河拆桥是他的家常便饭。
  • Pinyin: Xiǎoxīn diǎn nàge zhèngkè, tā wèile quánlì shénme dōu zuò de chūlái, guò hé chāi qiáo shì tā de jiāchángbiànfàn.
  • English: Be careful of that politician. He'll do anything for power; betraying his allies is a routine for him.
  • Analysis: The phrase 家常便饭 (jiāchángbiànfàn), meaning “a common meal” or “routine,” is used here to emphasize how habitually this person engages in such treacherous behavior.
• Example 6:
  • 你现在就想把我踢出项目组？你这是过河拆桥！
  • Pinyin: Nǐ xiànzài jiù xiǎng bǎ wǒ tī chū xiàngmù zǔ? Nǐ zhè shì guò hé chāi qiáo!
  • English: You want to kick me out of the project team now? You're just using me and tossing me aside!
  • Analysis: A very direct, confrontational use of the idiom in a moment of anger.
• Example 7:
  • 历史上，很多开国皇帝都会过河拆桥，杀掉那些功劳太大的将军。
  • Pinyin: Lìshǐ shàng, hěnduō kāiguó huángdì dūhuì guò hé chāi qiáo, shā diào nàxiē gōngláo tài dà de jiāngjūn.
  • English: Historically, many founding emperors would “dismantle the bridge after crossing the river,” killing the generals whose contributions were too great.
  • Analysis: This shows the idiom's use in a formal, historical context to describe a recurring political pattern.
• Example 8:
  • 他利用完我的资源就跟我断了联系，这种过河拆桥的行为太令人寒心了。
  • Pinyin: Tā lìyòng wán wǒ de zīyuán jiù gēn wǒ duàn le liánxì, zhè zhǒng guò hé chāi qiáo de xíngwéi tài lìng rén hánxīn le.
  • English: He cut off all contact with me after using up my resources. This kind of backstabbing behavior is really disheartening.
  • Analysis: The phrase 令人寒心 (lìng rén hánxīn - to make one's heart go cold) is often paired with 过河拆桥 to express the deep disappointment and hurt caused by the betrayal.
• Example 9:
  • 当初他求我帮忙的时候说得那么好听，现在却过河拆桥，翻脸不认人。
  • Pinyin: Dāngchū tā qiú wǒ bāngmáng de shíhòu shuō de nàme hǎotīng, xiànzài què guò hé chāi qiáo, fānliǎn bùrèn rén.
  • English: He said so many nice things when he was begging me for help, but now he's turned his back on me completely.
  • Analysis: Here, it's paired with another idiom, 翻脸不认人 (fānliǎn bùrèn rén - to turn one's face and not recognize someone), which means to suddenly turn hostile. They work together to paint a vivid picture of the betrayal.
• Example 10:
  • 我不是要过河拆桥，只是我们合作的阶段已经结束了，情况不同了。
  • Pinyin: Wǒ bùshì yào guò hé chāi qiáo, zhǐshì wǒmen hézuò de jiēduàn yǐjīng jiéshù le, qíngkuàng bùtóng le.
  • English: I'm not trying to be ungrateful, it's just that the phase of our cooperation has ended, and the situation is different now.
  • Analysis: This is an example of someone defending themselves against an accusation of 过河拆桥, showing how potent the charge is. They are denying the negative intention associated with the idiom.

• False Friend: “Burn one's bridges”
  • The most common mistake for English speakers is to equate 过河拆桥 with “burning one's bridges.” They are different.
  • 过河拆桥 is an act of betrayal against a helper. The focus is on your ingratitude toward another person.
  • “Burning one's bridges” is an act of cutting off your own path of retreat. The focus is on eliminating your own options.
  • Incorrect Usage Example: You quit your job and yell at your boss, ensuring you can never work there again. You might say, “I really burned my bridges.” You would NOT say: “我真是过河拆桥了。(Wǒ zhēn shì guò hé chāi qiáo le.)” This is wrong because your boss wasn't the “bridge” that helped you get to a new, better place.
• It's a Serious Accusation
  • This idiom is not used for minor slights or simple rudeness. It implies a significant debt of gratitude being ignored. Accusing someone of 过河拆桥 is a harsh criticism of their moral character.

• Synonyms (Same meaning, different image):
  • 卸磨杀驴 (xiè mò shā lǘ) - To kill the donkey after it's done grinding. A very close synonym, equally vivid and negative.
  • 鸟尽弓藏 (niǎo jìn gōng cáng) - To store away the bow after the birds are all shot. Often used in political or historical contexts for getting rid of useful subordinates once a crisis is over.
  • 忘恩负义 (wàng ēn fù yì) - To forget kindness and betray righteousness. A more formal and abstract synonym that describes the character trait rather than the specific action.
• Antonym (The proper behavior):
  • 知恩图报 (zhī ēn tú bào) - To know a kindness and plan to repay it. This is the highly valued moral opposite of 过河拆桥.
• Related Concepts:
  • 恩将仇报 (ēn jiāng chóu bào) - To repay kindness with hatred. This is even worse than 过河拆桥; it's not just discarding the helper, but actively harming them.
  • 背信弃义 (bèi xìn qì yì) - To betray trust and abandon righteousness. A broader term for being treacherous and disloyal in any context, not just after receiving help.
  • 人情 (rénqíng) - The concept of human favor and social obligation. The act of 过河拆桥 is a serious violation of the principles of 人情.