nín guì xìng: 您贵姓 - What is your honorable surname?
Quick Summary
Keywords: nín guì xìng, nin gui xing, 您贵姓, what is your name in Chinese, how to ask for name formally, Chinese politeness, honorable surname, respect in Chinese culture, how to ask for last name in Chinese
Summary: “您贵姓” (nín guì xìng) is the essential formal and polite phrase in Mandarin Chinese for asking “What is your surname?”. Literally translating to “What is your honorable surname?”, this question is a cornerstone of respectful interaction in business, formal settings, or when addressing elders. Understanding how and when to use “nín guì xìng” is a key step for any beginner learner to navigate Chinese social etiquette and demonstrate cultural awareness.
Concise Definition: What is your honorable surname?
In a Nutshell: “您贵姓” is the gold standard for politely asking for someone's last name in Chinese. It's not a casual “What's your name?”. It's a question packed with respect, using the formal “you” (您 nín) and “honorable” (贵 guì) to elevate the person you're speaking to. You use it when you want to show deference and good manners, for example, when meeting a new boss, a professor, or your partner's parents.
Character Breakdown
您 (nín): This is the formal and polite version of “you”. It's a direct upgrade from the standard 你 (nǐ) and is used to show respect to elders, superiors, or new acquaintances in formal situations.
贵 (guì): This character means “honorable,” “noble,” or “expensive.” In this context, it functions as a respectful prefix, elevating the status of the noun that follows it. You are literally calling the other person's family name “honorable.”
姓 (xìng): This character means “surname” or “family name.”
The characters combine to form a question: “[What is] your honorable surname?”. It's a beautiful example of how respect is embedded directly into the grammar and vocabulary of the Chinese language.
Cultural Context and Significance
In Chinese culture, a person's surname (姓 xìng) is profoundly important. It connects them to their ancestry, lineage, and family history. Therefore, asking for a surname is a significant first step in getting to know someone formally. The phrase “您贵姓” acknowledges this importance.
Contrast with Western Culture: In the US or Europe, it's common and friendly to immediately ask, “What's your first name?”. This reflects a more individualistic and informal social approach. In China, leading with “您贵姓” reflects a more collectivist and hierarchical culture where showing respect for family and social standing is paramount. Using this phrase signals that you understand and respect these social norms.
The interaction is a dance of politeness. The questioner elevates the other person with “贵” (honorable), and the traditional response, “免贵姓…” (miǎn guì xìng…), which means “[My] surname is exempt from 'honorable'…”, shows humility. This exchange is a microcosm of the Chinese values of respect (尊敬 zūnjìng) and modesty (谦虚 qiānxū).
Practical Usage in Modern China
When to use “您贵姓”:
Meeting a business client, a new boss, or a senior colleague.
Being introduced to an elder or a person of high social standing (e.g., a professor, a government official).
Meeting your significant other's parents or elder relatives for the first time.
Any formal setting where you want to make a good, respectful impression.
How to Respond to “您贵姓”:
Traditional/Humble: 免贵姓 + [Surname]. (Miǎn guì xìng + [Surname]). For example: “免贵姓王。” (Miǎn guì xìng Wáng.) - “My humble surname is Wang.” This is very polite and still common in formal business.
Modern/Common: 我姓 + [Surname]. (Wǒ xìng + [Surname]). For example: “我姓王。” (Wǒ xìng Wáng.) - “My surname is Wang.” This is perfectly acceptable and very common today.
When NOT to use “您贵姓”:
With friends, peers, classmates, or children. In these casual situations, it would sound strange and overly formal. Instead, you would use “你叫什么名字？” (Nǐ jiào shénme míngzi?).
Example Sentences
Example 1:
A: 请问，您贵姓？
Pinyin: A: Qǐngwèn, nín guì xìng?
English: A: Excuse me, what is your honorable surname?
Analysis: This is the most standard, polite way to ask. “请问” (qǐngwèn) adds an extra layer of politeness, similar to “May I ask…”.
English: At a business meeting, Little Wang said to a new client: “Manager Zhang, a pleasure to meet you! I don't believe I've gotten your honorable surname yet?”
Analysis: This is a slightly indirect and very smooth way to ask in a business context, assuming you might have missed it.
English: My boyfriend's father asked me: “Young lady, what is your honorable surname?”
Analysis: This shows an elder initiating the polite question to a younger person they are meeting formally for the first time. The “ya” at the end softens the tone slightly.
English: A: What is your honorable surname? B: My surname is Chen. A: Okay, Mr. Chen, how should I address you?
Analysis: This dialogue demonstrates a common follow-up question, “怎么称呼您” (zěnme chēnghu nín), which asks for their preferred title or way to be addressed.
English: A: This is our Chairman of the Board. B: Hello, Chairman, may I ask your honorable surname?
Analysis: When being introduced to a very high-ranking person, this phrase is absolutely essential to show the proper level of deference.
Example 10:
虽然我们认识很久了，但我从来没正式地问过：您贵姓？
Pinyin: Suīrán wǒmen rènshi hěn jiǔ le, dàn wǒ cónglái méi zhèngshì de wènguò: Nín guì xìng?
English: Although we've known each other a long time, I've never formally asked: What is your honorable surname?
Analysis: This illustrates a rare but possible use to retroactively fix a social oversight, acknowledging that you should have asked this formal question earlier.
Nuances and Common Mistakes
Mistake 1: Using it in casual situations.
Incorrect: (To a fellow student in your dorm) “嗨，您贵姓？” (Hāi, nín guì xìng?)
Why it's wrong: This is far too formal and sounds awkward, even sarcastic. It creates social distance.
Mistake 3: Confusing it with a request for a full name.
“您贵姓” specifically asks for the surname (姓 xìng) only. Don't respond with your full name. If they want your full name, they will ask differently, perhaps by saying “您全名是…?” (Nín quánmíng shì…?).
Related Terms and Concepts
* 你叫什么名字 (nǐ jiào shénme míngzi) - The informal “What's your name?”. This is what you use with friends, kids, and peers.
* 怎么称呼 (zěnme chēnghu) - “How should I address you?”. A polite phrase often used after getting someone's surname to ask for their title (e.g., Manager Wang, Dr. Li).
* 免贵 (miǎn guì) - “My surname is exempt from 'honorable'”. The classic, humble prefix used when answering “您贵姓”. It literally means “exempt from honorifics.”
* 姓 (xìng) - The noun for “surname” or “family name”.
* 名字 (míngzi) - The noun for “given name” or “first name”.
* 您 (nín) - The formal pronoun for “you”, which is the foundation of this phrase's politeness.
* 尊敬 (zūnjìng) - The verb or noun for “to respect” or “respect”. This is the core cultural value that “您贵姓” expresses.
* 幸会 (xìnghuì) - “A pleasure to meet you.” A formal greeting that often accompanies an exchange involving “您贵姓”.